Brittany Cartwright is speaking out after filing for divorce from Jax Taylor, explaining her decision “wasn’t made lightly or quickly.”

“It’s been a big week,” Cartwright, 35, admitted on the Friday, August 30 episode of her and Jax’s joint podcast, “When Reality Hits.”

“I unfortunately can’t speak to details since everything has been heavily documented on the show since we happen to be filming right now. You will see how everything plays out once the show airs, but I will say this: This season has been the most difficult season I have ever had to film.”

Cartwright opened up about the personal toll the separation had taken on her, especially given how public the news became.

“I never imagined I’d go through something so personal and painful while having the world watch. I’m not saying this for anyone to feel badly, but I know that this is the life I chose and I’m so fortunate in many ways. I always want to be real with y’all,” she said.

Denying that the divorce was “a publicity stunt”, Cartwright shared further details while thanking fans for their support.

“My decision to file wasn’t made lightly or quickly. It’s taken me many, many years to get to this point where I gained enough courage and strength to do what’s best for me, get myself out of a toxic relationship and ultimately see my worth,” she said. “It’s been very difficult, but I’m stronger than ever … my motivation is my son, my Cruzie, who deserves a happy and healthy mommy. Moving forward, Jax and I will be doing the podcast separately.”

Us Weekly confirmed on Tuesday, August 27, that Cartwright filed to end her five-year marriage to Taylor, 45. She listed January 24 as the pair’s date of separation in documents obtained by Us, citing irreconcilable differences as the reason for their split. Cartwright requested that the court not grant spousal support to her or Taylor.

The reality star is seeking primary legal and physical custody of the couple’s 3-year-old son, Cruz, with Taylor having visitation.

Cartwright revealed in February that she and Taylor were “taking time apart,” addressing widespread “speculation” about their relationship status.

“So many of you guys have been asking me about Jax and I and our relationship. I just think it is important to be real and honest with you guys because we have shared so much of our life with you guys,” she said on an episode of their “When Reality Hits” podcast. “I don’t want it to seem like I am lying or anything like that. So I think it is important for me to say this. … Yes, marriages are very hard, and I had a particularly rough year.”

Cartwright emphasized that she wanted to “be transparent” with her fans, revealing that she moved “into another home” amid their marital woes. “I won’t get into too many details right now because this is still really hard to talk about,” she added, noting that her main focus was “being the best mom to Cruz.”

One month later, Taylor exclusively opened up to Us about navigating the separation. “I want people to know that it is possible to coparent and run businesses and be OK with each other,” he said at the premiere party for season 1 of The Valley. “Not everybody just gets divorced because they cheated. Believe it or not, that was not the case. I know it’s shocking. We’re just not communicating right now and that’s all there is to it. … We’re taking some time for ourselves.”

In a separate interview, Cartwright told Us that she still had a lot of love for Taylor despite their troubles. “I love him, but I feel I deserve better than what I’ve been given. It’s a back-and-forth,” she said, adding that she wanted Cruz to “grow up watching a happy household.”

Cartwright delved further into the state of her relationship with Taylor pre-divorce in an April issue of Us Weekly. “He definitely takes me for granted and takes everything that we have for granted. He’s always looking for something else, even if it’s working or this or that, he just never seems to be satisfied,” she claimed. “He can’t really slow down and be grateful for what we have. And that’s always a lot of pressure on me, because I’m very happy.”

Bravo fans have witnessed the pair’s ups and downs through the years. Cartwright joined Taylor on season 4 of Vanderpump Rules in 2015, and viewers watched the couple exchange vows in 2019 after working through Taylor’s infidelity. The pair left Lisa Vanderpump‘s reality series in 2020, making their return to TV on the spinoff The Valley, which debuted earlier this year.

Cameras are currently rolling on season 2 of The Valley. Shortly before Cartwright filed for divorce, Taylor completed a 30-day treatment program for his mental health.

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