You’re only as old as the person you feel.
Great sex can be a given during our golden years, experts say — it just might look a little different.
“Getting older is not about trying to be able to do the same sexual activities you’ve always done before,” said clinical sexologist and sexuality educator Lawrence Siegel, “but to find positions and paces that are more comfortable and make the sexual act more enjoyable.”
“If sex is painful or uncomfortable, it leads to disappointment and avoidance, which detracts from the quality of life for both individuals and couples,” Siegel told HuffPost.
Embracing the march of time — that means loving being in your aging skin — means you’ll have more fun, too, according to the pros.
“People who enjoy sex over their lifespan all report being able to enjoy first and foremost being in their bodies,” sex therapist Nan Wise, author of “Why Good Sex Matters”, told the outlet.
“Rather than thinking so much about how our bodies look to others, the ability to feel connected with the sensations in our bodies and appreciate all that’s right with our bodies, rather than focus on how we think our bodies should look and feel, is key to lifelong sexual potential,” she said.
5 naughty but nice positions to try for great sex over 60
This frisky spin on the classic position has the woman or receiving partner lie down on the edge of the bed, legs in the air and a pillow beneath their lower back. The man, or penetrating partner, is then able to gain significant leverage without putting pressure on the woman’s hips or lower back — or theirs, sex therapist Jesse Kahn said.
“The partner standing up is able to use more of their body for force, rather than predominantly their hips,” Kahn, the director of the Gender & Sexuality Therapy Center in New York City, told HuffPost.
Never done it? No time like the present. The all-ages method of simultaneous oral sex puts one partner on the bottom and the other on top, each facing the other’s genitals. Here, once again, to relieve pressure, flip the script and lay on your sides, facing one another.
“You can play around with positions based on each person’s needs, such as one partner being on top of the other or the sideways 69,” Kahn said. “The sideways 69 reduces stress on the joints and body to hold yourself up by having both partners laying on their sides. Of course, being on a soft surface, such as a bed, can help with comfort and reduce stress on the body as well.”
The speed bump
For this one, the woman or receiving partner lies on their stomach with a pillow, wedged or otherwise, cushioning their hips. Then, the man, or penetrating partner, enters from behind in the tabletop position.
This position allows the receiver to have a greater measure of control over the depth and angle of penetration, according to Siegel.
It might seem a little youth-oriented, but going up on all fours can be great for those with hip problems and lower mobility, Kahn said. (Those with knee problems and back pain are most likely excused.)
Need additional support? Try putting a pillow beneath the pelvic area of the receiver.
“In this position, you can also play around with your leg position, such as wide-legged, based on each person’s body’s needs,” Kahn said.
Here’s one you can do forever — even with the most limited mobility and flexibility.
Siegel describes the romantic standby thusly: “Both partners are lying on their sides, facing the same direction, with the back of one partner against the front of the other.”
From here, you can go anywhere, without exerting yourself too greatly, Siegel points out. Options include “reaching over and playing with your partner’s breasts, vulva, penis or belly, holding them close as you press against them,” he suggested.
Intercourse is possible too, with the man entering entering from behind. And if penetration isn’t desired or possible, rubbing the penis between the thighs can be just as rewarding. Penetration doesn’t necessarily spell pleasure, reminds Siegel.
“It’s about sharing intimacy, affection and emotional gratification,” he said.