We listen and let the psychologist judge.
One of TikTok’s current viral trends has duos confessing secrets to one another on camera.
The videos begin with both people saying, “We listen and we don’t judge,” in unison before divulging previously hush-hush insights they’ve hidden from the other person.
Co-workers and family members have taken on the trend, but the majority of videos involve couples sharing their secrets.
However, the “not judging” part seems to be more of a plea than a reality in some.
In some of the most viral videos, couples have admitted to everything from unplugging the internet router to get their partner’s attention to faking orgasms to instead watch TV.
In one particularly hilarious video, a married couple goes back and forth with reveals, seemingly taking great pains to keep their reactions in check.
But at the end of the two-minute clip, the wife, Jamie, proclaims, “You’re done,” before she walks away and her husband, Dave, lets out a laugh.
Many people have shared strong opinions about the trend in comments, but psychologist Avigail Lev is mostly “ambivalent” about it.
“The trend seems like it’s promoting honesty because you’re telling your partner or your friend everything you’ve done,” Lev told Today.com.
“But it’s not that honest or transparent because most are things that they’ve done right behind each other’s backs.”
While some of the admissions are minor — like stealing a kid’s fries or sneaking some ice cream — others are more concerning — like faking headaches and bathroom breaks to hide from one another and lying about getting Botox.
“I think that the dilemma here is that certain things that people are doing, I wouldn’t recommend to say it in a different way. I would just recommend not to do it,” she says. “Better to not lie to begin with so you don’t have to confess.”
Viewers will never really know what confessions are true and what’s clickbait, but Lev worries that people might be hurt by the videos.
“They’re hearing things that they didn’t know their partner was doing, and that’s not a fun thing to witness while you’re live on TikTok,” she noted.
However, if the admission isn’t hurtful these videos can be a fun way to honestly communicate and catch up with your partner.
“When you can bring humor into it, it always makes it easier to kind of express yourself,” Dylan Reese told Today.com after going viral with one of the most wholesome versions of the trend.
